The ‘Palin’quin Bearers…

Sarah Palin – Such great a personality!!! The second person I admire and look up to for inspiration after ‘The’ Bart Simpson. Sarah Palin’s the lady who rose from being a small town mayor of Alaska’s Wasilla City to the Alaskan Governor, Republican prospective Vice President candidate and ‘to be’ Republican party presidential candidate in 2012 (perhaps this is the disaster that Nostradamus had predicted for 2012). This lady has had more parodied appearances on Saturday Night Live than her official addresses to the masses, She’s the person whom little American girls idolise and want to be like when they grow up, also Biharian beauty Rabri Devi is rumored to be inspired from her… Errr I think that’s too much praises for this dumbster of a lady.

For those of you who have no idea regarding who this wonderful woman is, don’t worry, it’s not worth knowing about her and yeah, DON’T GOOGLE her name for the search engine will display no useful information (pun very much intended)…

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No wonder I’m Feeling Lucky!!!

Okay so to save your time let me show you her bikini pictures, err… I mean brief you about this nature’s wonderful creation, you might recall her as the Republican Vice president Candidate from 2008 White House Elections selected by John McCain (yeah of course no one knew her before that) who came under close International media scrutiny particularly regarding her religious perspective on public life, her socially conservative views, a perceived lack of experience and mostly because of $15,000 and $21,000 she charged on the state of Alaska for buying clothes for her husband and kids and for making her children travel with her on business trips respectively.

And yeah, I know you’re getting impatient now, this is how she looks…

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Doesn’t she look like one of those women in the Van Halen videos who takes off her glasses, shakes out her hair, and then all of a sudden, she’s in stilettos and a bikini!! All of a sudden.

There also have been controversies associated with her (and you thought that only Indian politicos are known for it) and bizarre statements she has given in public, the list is endless but here’s some points which I can recall at the moment…

  • She believes that global warming is not man made. (Yes Ma’am, so are the Panama Canal and Mount Rushmore) 
  • Barack Obama is the first black man she’s ever seen in her life. (The only other job she had in politics was the mayor of a small town Wasilla, Alaska, and look at her stars, now she has the opportunity to be on a ticket opposite of Barack Obama, the first black man she’s ever seen.)
  • She claims to see Russia from land from her hometown Wasilla, Alaska and frankly this is the reason she gave for letting her handle trade relations with Russia.  (Yeah, now I can predict what her next claim would be, she would say that in Wasilla with a good antenna she can watch Dealski or No Dealski, or Russian Idol, or Desperate Babushkas, or Hannah Siberia, or The New Adventures Of Old Gorbachev, or Two & A Half Ruskies, or CSI: Moscow, or The Biggest Boozer, or It’s Always Sunny In Saint Petersburg, or Everybody Loves Putin, or Hole In The Berlin Wall, or Russia’s Got Talent, or Buffy The Mafia Slayer…) 
  • She has been caught reading her speech written on her hand. (Her name should’ve been Sarah Parrot and she could’ve been a bit more wiser if she had slightly bigger hands)
  • Her daughter Bristol (no, it’s not a Cigarette or Truck Engine Oil brand name) got pregnant at the age of 16.
  • She charged the state of Alaska $21,000 for making her children travel with her on business trips. (And the republicans were not mad at her, why should they be for if she leaves her kids home alone, they get pregnant)
  • She likes to shoot animals in the Alaskan Jungles from helicopter (hard to believe but its true)
  • She can’t name the newspapers she reads ‘regularly’ (obvious from her cbs interview)
  • Her Yahoo account was once hacked because she hadn’t taken the proper security measures. (Yeah, it’s official. No one in the Palin family uses protection!)
  • She has given weird poses wearing a bikini and holding a rifle… (deadly combo I must say, Here’s the picture, can’t post this directly on the blog for this is a family read. And I am having a hard time imagining our very own Mayawatiji in such outfit, don’t know about the rest but the rifle will surely suit her bandit queen looks and personality.)
  • John McCain’s campaign had said that Sarah Palin will not talk to the media, until reporters address her with respect and deference, only pictures would be allowed (Oh, what is she running for, Vice President or The Queen of England or America’s Next Top Model?)
  • She can’t comment on Bush Doctrine (for she doesn’t know the meaning of ‘doctrine’)

Now I bumped into these funny one liners on Sarah Palin on the internet while doing research for this post, so here they are and remember, its just a joke, Palin never said, articulated, stated, verbalized, uttered, mumbled, vocalized, expressed, aired, announced, declared, enunciated, proclaimed, alleged, mouthed, murmured, phrased, thought, imagined, or even dreamt any of these lines… But you gotta agree that they are funny.

  • I know all about Iran. I ran for Mayor and then I ran for Governor.
  • I look forward to negotiating with the Shi’ites, as I haven’t had a good one all week.
  • I put a $150 bounty on every wolf shot from a helicopter. How much do I have to offer for Obama?
  • When the reporter asked me about Iraq, I thought he was eyeing my rack.
  • When I started with Yahoo Mail I thought it was a guy who liked to party!
  • EU? That’s what I say whenever Trig pukes up.
  • I don’t know about Fidel Castro, but Todd (her husband) has a Gibson Guitar.
  • I’m sure victory in Iraq is in the Bag, Dad.
  • I don’t think that Americans should elect Barack Hussein Obama, a man who is related to Saddam!
  • Of course I know about the Gaza Strip. I had to wrap one on Todd’s injured arm.
  • I know how to deal with Sarkozy. I’ll just ship my daughter to Paris and he’ll drop Carla like a rock.
  • Yes, I posed in a bikini holding a rifle. Should I not have worn the bikini?
  • Does The Bush Doctrine mean he has a female physician?

“Sarah Palin has admitted she tried marijuana several years ago, but she did not like it. She said it distorted her perceptions, impaired her thinking, and she’s hoping that the effects will eventually wear off." –Jay Leno

Q: Why will Britney Spears and Lady Gaga vote for Sarah Palin?
A: Because they are running out of other crazy things to do.

Q: Which person did President Obama thank first for helping him win the 2008 election?
A: Sarah Palin

Q: How does Sarah Palin know that the world celebrated Barack Obama’s victory in the 2008 election?
A: She could see the Russians celebrating from her house!

Q: How dumb is Sarah Palin?
A1: She’s so dumb that she thinks the capital of China is Chinatown!
A2: She’s so dumb that she thinks billboards are postcards from giants
A3: She’s so dumb that she thinks soy milk is Spanish for ‘I am milk.

Well, so the point of giving you so much of information about Palin was to make you watch this video, a clip from NBC’s Saturday Night Live where Tina Fey of ‘30 Rock’ and ‘Date Night’ fame has posed as Sarah Palin and another actress is dressed up as Hillary Clinton and here they create a scene on which I couldn’t stop laughing after watching. Palin and Clinton for Presidency!! :S From Anderson Cooper to SNL all are making jokes on Palin (and as usual I just love them!!)

So check this out, the hilarious video of Palin and Clinton’s joint address to the nation, they look so identical to the real personalities and Fey’s voice is so closely identical to Palin’s. If not told I would’ve clearly assumed her to be the real Sarah Palin Winking smile And the funniest part is when… well, see it by yourself, I bet you won’t stop laughing!!

Well it can only be on SNL that Republicans and Democrats address the nation in a single frame!! Smile with tongue out

Few more equally funny videos… Open-mouthed smile

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4 responses to “The ‘Palin’quin Bearers…

  1. Pingback: December!!! « Kay's Blog

  2. Pingback: The Great Indian Media Joke!!! « Kay's Blog

  3. Pingback: Suicides on the name of the state!! (Phewww… Goodness) « Kay's Blog

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