Warning:If you are expecting from the title that this post is about the uprising of Indian youth, their power, the change they can bring in the society, India being the youngest country and all such crap then please browse away (particularly you, Italian Spammer).
Pitiable is the condition and mind-set of the youth of India these days. They live in a world where Chulbul Pandey is their role model, an Android phone is considered as status symbol, where listening to Munni and Sheila is the in thing, where their ultimate aim is to be a MTV Roadie and where Pepsi decides to name an entire country after them. In short majority of the young population of India these days is illiterate, uncivil, pretentious and largely clueless just like Mayawati.
To Clarify my point I have come upon these examples after much trouble and surveillance.
These are in abundance these days. Those who show to be a die hard Man U or Barcelona fans fall in this category. They stay awake entire nights to watch the matches just to update their facebook status next morning to show the world that they follow ‘wilayti’ sports. Guys, NO ONE gives a damn about whether you support Man U or Barcelona. You are not Shahrukh Khan or Shilpa Shetty, i.e. they’re not YOUR teams and their success doesn’t mean that YOU won. No matter how many jersey’s you buy from a trip to the Adidas Store or Palica Bazaar, no matter how many soccer shoes you buy and wear at inappropriate places, NO ONE gives a damn. Find some other goddamn purpose in life than tweet about players whose names you can’t pronounce and who you’ve only been exposed to in FIFA 2010.
The Fakers, a.k.a. Victims of Marketing. They like to show the world the other non existent side of them, i.e. what they are actually not. They are usually ugly looking, without girlfriends, generally hail from small cities and you will find them frequenting malls with earphones in their ears for window shopping and acting as facebook models (particularly girls) posing by pouting outside malls, with Mc Donald’s effigy on that bench and even near someone else’s Ford Ikon. Words like ‘yo’, ‘ma’, ‘lol’ etc. are thrown up up in their limited vocabulary to sound kool. They can be sporting a pathetic accent, trying to look kool by listening to hip-hop, rock and other ‘non Bollywood’ genres of music, wannabes who attend any remotely ‘happening’ event in the town. They often come across you with sentences as “Dude, ‘Mama’s Dirty Little Secret’ ka latest song suna kya? Ultimate Fucking guitars man!” and then go home, satisfy their milky tea addiction and watch those gujju accent sitcoms on SAB or try watching ‘How I Met Your Mother’ with subtitles. Generally kids from certain colleges and call centre employees fall in this category.
Dharavi Fashion Show Participants
They are people with worst dressing sense the mankind has ever seen. They generally wear low waist Jeans just to show the brand of boxers they are wearing, They should learn that no one wants to see their hairy bottoms when they bend down, also no one gives a damn whether they wear Jockey or Ranjit Smart. This all is accompanied by short tight tees to show that they do work out at gyms. They are generally seen on bikes wearing goggles even at 8 in the night and frequenting malls to show their (pathetic) dressing to the chicks.
The most popular ones – Youngistanis a.k.a MTV/Channel [V] reality show followers, generally aimless, lusting after rowdy, punjabi swearing cheap reality show participants and crying desperately for someone to talk to them in kewl lingo fall under this category. They actually admire Raghu Ram and his bald twin by saying “Kya personality hai boss, Koi unke saamne ek minute bhi nahi tik paye” and dream of being a part of MTV Roadies (and hence getting insulted on national television) one day followed by a modelling career. Those craving for two minutes of fame just like Rakhi Sawant are also Youngistanis. They have the count and the names of the previous season Roadies winners who have made it big (in underwear ads and cameos in flop Bollywood flicks) on their fingertips and hence no need to mention, in their eyes the biggest achievement of life would be to come on TV by sitting in front of Raghu and his twin and accepting their insulting comments. I don’t blame them, I blame MTV for corrupting their minds by showing such junk fit for a person whose IQ is equivalent to a fellow whose favorite author is Chetan Bhagat and making them believe that swearing in every 2.5 sentences and referring to that girl in college you hate as sl**ty bitch is kewl. I would personally suggest such people to find some other goddamn purpose in their lives.
The Intellectual Ones
Generally poor at English. They pick up Paulo Coelho out of curiosity to check out what’s so intelligent about it everyone’s been talking about but fail to get any sense of the book, instead they end up reading the graphic love scenes of Eleven Minutes again and again to have the worth of their money. After that they stick Coelho as their favorite author on their facebook profiles to look intellectual, but the truth is that they just brought it at the train station because everyone has one copy and felt a bit to generous than buying that Hindi porn magazine. Also they update their facebooks with inspirational quotes from Coelho’s books and elsewhere. My Advice – Stop faking and pretending to be an intellectual. We all know you just Google quotes on love, success, friendship to try and make sense of your life and give yourself some comfort.
I guess I will stop here. I have a suggestion; I guess you readers can add more categories to this. Please leave it in your comments. Not that I am expecting a lot of them considering the trend, but I am willing to take a chance. And Just avoid being one of the above if you want to be a successful individual and a ‘human being’